The World's First Naked Superhero: Answers to the Questions on YOUR Minds

This is Ninja Demon Baby. Allow me to explain what is going on in this photo for those who are not familiar with him.

1) Yes, he is naked.

2) Yes, those are SOCKS on his arms. Those are his superhero arm shields and muscle guards.

3) Yes, that is his flying dragon in his arms.

4) Yes, that IS a bamboo stick used for creating kabobs in the kitchen but handy as a Ninja Demon Baby weapon.

5) No, I have not been LYING all this time about just how imaginative . . . AND how naked he is.

6) Yes, it is hard for me to maintain a straight face when he comes into my office dressed this way, but I do.

7) Yes, I know. When he starts kindergarten in a year and a half they REALLY will not know what to do with him.

8) If you traveled here from my author site here, and yesterday's post, YES, he really DID single-handedly BREAK a car. A real car. Like one you drive. Yeah. I know. Unbelievable.

9) Yes. That is gray hair on my head.

10) Yes. Given his outfit of choice since he woke up this morning, that IS a smile on my face.

CSI

This is what greeted me yesterday. Demon Baby had apparently decided the upstairs was a crime scene.

Hence the crime scene tape.

Is it any wonder I buy toilet paper in bulk?

Another Real Conversation

Does marketing work? Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you . . . Exhibit Demon:


"Mom?" Demon Baby comes and stands by my desk chair and taps me on my arm. "I need you to get me something."

"What?"

"Soft cotton."

I look up from my computer. "I beg your pardon?"

"Yeah."

"Yeah what?"

"Soft cotton."

"I don't understand? Is it a toy? I've never heard of this toy? Say it again slowly."

Looking at me like I am an idiot, he pronounces it: "SOOOOOOOOFT COTTTTTTON!"

"Soft cotton?"

"Yeah, soft cotton."

I am completely confused. "I still don't get it. What is it you WANT?"

"It's on a commercial. Soft cotton. I think I need it."

"You mean, like those cotton commericals?"

"Yeah. And because you're my mom and you love me, and you're like the best mom I have--"

"I'm the ONLY mom you have."

"That too. And because you love me, you should really get me the best. Soft cotton."

Walks away.

So there you go, cotton industry. Apparently, your ads work.