Tuesday, February 26, 2008


It was inevitable.

I curse. I would love to think I am peaceful all the time, but damn the stress . . . I'm not. So between me, and whatever else he overhears, Demon Baby has learned curse words. Bad ones.

The F-word.
Bitch. (Which he calls Bits. As in, "Mom, you are such a BITS.")

He gets yelled at. Threatened with time-out. Doesn't matter. He uses them. So, through the process of ignoring him, they are dying down.

Except for . . .

Holy crap.
You are full of crap.

Now, the use of crap was my own attempt to not curse aroudn my kids. I remember my mom used to say, "Aww . . . SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHugar!" when we were little. When now I know, man, she wants to say, "sh*t." So I attempted to do the same. In other words, instead of saying, "Holy sh*t!" I now say "Holy crap!"

But then . . . having a 3-year-old spouting off "HOLY CRAP!" about nearly everything . . . is both funny and ridiculous. And . . . wearying.

"The mailman is here."

"Eat your peas."
"They're CRAP!"

"Look at the cardinal in the tree."
"HOLY CRAP! Will you look at that?"

Each has slightly different inflection.

So I suppose I am grateful he only uses the F-word once in a while and instead is the All-Crap Channel, All the Time.

But . . . well . . . CRAP!


conley730 said...

One of mine was saying damn it all the time. I first tried the ignoring it route b/c I've heard if they don't get any attention when they use the word they'll stop. Well, not my my devil child! I finally resorted to spanking and timeouts and THEN he finally quit! HOLY CRAP!!!

spyscribbler said...

ROFL ... I'd be one of those guests you hate, cracking up to tears, and incidentally encouraging him. I can imagine that must sound HILARIOUS coming from a three year old's mouth, LOL.

Speaking of which, HAPPY BIRTHDAY to him! Late, but Happy Birthday!

I don't know how I missed so many Demon Baby posts. I haven't set up a feed yet, but usually it blinks on my Blogroll. Sorry!

The Anti-Wife said...

Happy Birthday to Demon Baby! Crap is my word. I used to curse like a sailor, but decided I need to clean up my act a few years ago. Crap is much better than the other ones!

Erica Orloff said...

Hi Conley:
Well, so far NOTHING works. But. . . . I have four kids, including an 18-year-old. She used to curse and now is a lovely young plady, so . . . like everything, I'm gonna go with this being a "phase." ;-)

Erica Orloff said...

Believe ME, it's all I can do not to laugh, too.


Erica Orloff said...

Hi Anti-wife:
In trying to see the silver lining . . . it is better than some of what WAS flying out of his mouth.

Aimless Writer said...

I knew I was in trouble when my daughter was 4 and told the neighbor the dog's name was "Damn Dog". We sat down and had a long talk about the power of words, what they could do, how they could help or hurt and how sometimes people accidently used the wrong ones. I thought I handled it pretty good until she turned to me and said, "So her name isn't Damn Dog?"
Now I have a parrot who some wiseguy teenages taught to say, "What the F*ck". It was easier to explain things to the four year old....

Erica Orloff said...

LOL on the parrot. Mine just says "I love you!"

conley730 said...

I let the F bomb fly one time and Twin B went around for a few minutes saying it and I just waited it out. He finally quit and I haven't heard it again. I try REALLY hard to watch my language around them, but sometimes I let one fly and they NEVER fail to catch it.

Erica Orloff said...

Yes. I have a REAL feathered parrot. And a Demon Baby parrot. LOL!

Aimless Writer said...

What kind of parrot? Does he say "crap" yet? lol
My kids taught Elvis to make this awful WAAAAKKKWWWAAAK sound. Now he's doing it all day long. I guess it could be worse. They also taught him to make the sound of a bomb dropping. I've been trying for an "I love you" for years but Elvis is resistant to the idea. He has a perchant for learning the obnoxious stuff.

Erica Orloff said...

I have a Lesser Sulfur Crested Cockatoo named Ava. And she's kind of nuts. She was very peaceful when we got her . . . and she had a couple of very awesome years. Then, she went through her parrot adolescence. THEN, I had Demon Baby, meaning I had to keep her sort of separate in a heated space outdoors because she bit him once and it's easier to control her than Demon right now. Anyway, she says I Love You, she sometimes says my name. But she is REAALLY bonded to my Significant Other and now hates me. A LOT. She liked Oldest Son. So it's a guy thing. Loves them. Hates women.

Erica Ridley said...

LOL. Demon baby kills me!!!

Erica Orloff said...

SURE . . . you don't LIVE with him. LOL!

He's KILLIN' me, too, but in a different way. ;-)