Thursday, January 29, 2009

Apocalypse Now

That sound you just heard?

The gallop of four horsemen?

The apocalypse is upon us.

I tried to be in denial about it.

I thought if I don't acknowledge what Demon Baby is saying, he will eventually give up this notion.

After a week, he still kept on with it.

This will go away. Just don't acknowledge it. Denial.

Now . . . it's incessant. Firm. Belligerent. Loud. Insistent. Vocal beyond belief. It DEMANDS to be acknowledged.

Demon Baby has an imaginary friend.

Let's call him Demon Baby 2.0.

Demon Baby's imaginary friend has, in Demon's own words, "Magical powers, and he's really, really naughty. And SUPER HUMONGOUSLY POWERFUL!"

Demon Baby 2.0 has, when no one was looking, shredded an entire roll of toilet paper. Opened an entire box of Band-Aids and stuck every last one to the carpet. Drawn on Oldest Brother's wall. Discovered Oldest Sister's secret stash of gum, chewed pieces, and left them stuck to various pieces of furniture.

I could go on.

But now it's TWO of them.

And one of me.

There's no hope. Run for the hills.

15 comments:

Robin said...

This is just too horrible. I say keep denying it. Maybe it will go away. Or hide. Or change the locks.

Erica Orloff said...

I am frightened.

His "magical friend"? According to Demon Baby, he thinks being "bad" is "good."

Hellfire.
E

laughingwolf said...

what we have here is a requirement for a mom 2.0 ;)lol

momcat said...

This call for reinforcements. You need to get a magical friend of your own!!

Erica Orloff said...

laughingwolf:
YOU are a GENIUS! Now, why didn't I think of that???

Erica Orloff said...

momcat:
It's crystal clear. I need Mama Ninja II.
E

conley730 said...

When one of my guys had a very bad friend, I told them if he continued to be bad he wouldn't be able to live with us anymore. Surprisingly it worked! I'm pretty sure DB won't be so easily swayed though!

Erica Orloff said...

Conley:
Interesting tactic. I will tuck it away in my arsenal!

E

Cheryl Kauffman said...

Does Supernanny work on imaginary friends?

Erica Orloff said...

Cheryl:
LOL! I don't know. Maybe there is an IMAGINARY SUPERNANNY!

E

laughingwolf said...

cuz i'm OLDER? :O lol

Erica Orloff said...

Laughing Wolf:
He reminds me of how old I am every day. :-)
E

Melanie Avila said...

Oh nooooooooo...

Funny - my word verification was "pasta."

Erica Orloff said...

Laughing Wolf:
Glad you are aging along with me.
E

Erica Orloff said...

Melanie:
I know . . . I know . . . .

:-)
E