Friday, March 20, 2009

Silence Is Not Golden

Actual conversation.

"Demon Baby . . . Mama is having a bad day. PLEASE stop talking right now. You have poured chocolate syrup in the goldfish tank, which smells in strange and horrific ways, thrown all the folded laundry on the floor, and peed in the bathtub. PLEASE, go away for a few minutes while I try to regain my sense of serenity."

"No."

"Please."

"No."

"All right. Stay here, but PLEASE stop talking. You have not stopped chattering since you woke up this morning many, MANY hours ago."

"I CAN'T! I HAVE TOO MANY WORDS TO BE QUIET! NOW GET ME ICE CREAM!!!!"

16 comments:

Nessa said...

I love your blog, it always makes me smile! ;)..poor, poor sugarcheeks..er lady! Hope you find that silence!

spyscribbler said...

Oh my God, that sounds EXACTLY like a conversation between myself and my chattering brain.

laughingwolf said...

oh my... i guess you both survived, kinda? :O

Erica Orloff said...

Nessa:
I deal with the lack of silence and the mess by remembering that Erma Bombeck used to write that one day your house will be pristine, all beds made, etc., no crayons on the way, and you will MISS this time.

:-)
E

Erica Orloff said...

Spy:
I actually don't often wonder where he gets his high-octane brain from . . . he just channels his toward mayhem.
E

Erica Orloff said...

laughing wolf:
Yesterday it was iffy. ;-)
E

Cheryl Kauffman said...

At that point, I would have gotten him a LOT of ice cream. It is hard to talk while you are eating ice cream.

Lauren said...

I love how he said that he had too many words. So cute...although maybe in general verses at the moment :-P

Robin said...

I'm going to use that line the next time someone tells me to stop babbling, which I do way too often. No one gets me ice cream, though. They just stick their fingers in their ears.

fakefrenchie said...

The first part of his response was cute. The second part was not. You are his momma, not his slave! Good luc with the Demon Baby. Don't forget to take care of yourself.

Suzanne Perazzini said...

Constant talking can sure do your brain in. No time for my own thoughts drives me crazy. I empathize but yes, this time is over in the blink of an eye.

Erica Orloff said...

Cheryl:
Oh, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. You see, he allows his ice cream to melt completely (takes about ahlaf-hour), then drinks it through a crazy straw. He doesn't REALLY "eat" ice cream.

:-)
E

Erica Orloff said...

Lauren:
He is so vibrant . . . this energy 24/7. I can totally believe he's got "too many words" to keep up with.
E

Erica Orloff said...

Fake Frenchie:
Yeah. He knows I don't do "slave." So he pauses afterwards, rethinks, and does his now practiced, "Please wonderful mother, would you kindly get me some ice cream." (not kidding on that . . . .).

E

Erica Orloff said...

Suzanne:
Oldest Daughter yesterday asked me why I was so stressed (she doesn't live at home anymore but was home for four days). I said that it had finally dawned on me how much I like silence and being alone, and so not having that ability to have alone time sometimes wore on me. But I, too, know it's over in the blink of an eye.

My friends gave me a gift certificate for EIGHT HOURS of a nanny (wonderful woman who watched him a couple of times before). It was a gift of time! I am determined to save it and do something like go to a museum by MYSELF.

E

Melanie Avila said...

I'm using that on my husband the next time he gives me "the look" that I've been talking too long. He's often the only person I speak to all day!